Whitney Writes…

Wait… wait… just….. WAIT. Before we delve into this too deeply…. 2023 and 2024 had the same dang theme??? Seems a bit lazy… Maybe after the train wreck of drama (more on that later…) that surrounded Eurovision this year and made the entire contest anything BUT united by music, the EBU will think again before they repeat a theme in back-to-back years. And yes, Open Up from 2020/2021 is different, since it was ironically from the Covid years.

The Drama Behind The Scenes

Before we dive into the deep end of getting all nerdy about the voting stats – I’ve made graphs – we have to talk about the behind the scenes drama that encased this year’s contest. It seemed at every turn, there was a new bit of drama.

Before the contest even began, it was plagued by the issue of Israel being allowed to participate. Considering Russia has been banned since it’s invasion of Ukraine, it seems unprecedented that Israel was allowed to partake. A bit hypocritical, if you will. While I believe Eden – Israel’s representative – acted with grace, it doesn’t sound like the same could be said for her delegation team. There were reports of harassment and intimidation by members of her team to other countries’ delegations. Due to this seeming double-standard, Malmö was not only host to the Eurovision Song Contest, but also to multiple pro-Palestinian marches and demonstrations.

The EBU should have seen the writing on the wall, really, it would be impossible for the contest to remain “politics free”.

In the press conference following Semi-Final 2, when it was time for Eden Golan, from Israel, to receive her questions, numerous artists did their own form of protest. Marina Satti, from Greece, yawned profusely and repeatedly, putting her head down on the table, pretending to sleep. Joost Klein, from the Netherlands, covered himself entirely with his country’s flag. One reporter asked her something along the lines of how she felt her presence at the contest was not endangering other performers and residents of Malmö, Sweden. When the moderator told her she didn’t have to answer, Joost shouted from beneath his flag: “WHY?” Prior to the contest, many of the participating artists had declared their support of Palestine in the on-going war with Israel.

On the Friday after Semi Final 2, news broke that there had been an incident involving Joost Klein from the Netherlands. It was shrouded in vagueness, but he wasn’t at dress rehearsals for the Flag Ceremony, nor was he allowed to perform his Jury Vote performance. Speculation was flying around online in various social media groups. It was eventually announced that there had been an incident between Joost and a Swedish member of the media that was still under investigation by the Swedish police. And the EBU handed down their decision to – for the first time in Eurovision history – disqualify someone. While that seems drastic for something not proven, I think it speaks volumes for how well Joost Klein would have done in the Grand Final. As huge of debacle as this was for the EBU, disqualifying a MASSIVE fan favorite, who was also high in the bookies’ ranks to win, matters would be far worse for them if, down the road, it was determined he had done something and then won.

To say people in the Eurovision fanbase were outraged, is an incredible understatement.

Semi-Final 1 (Tuesday, 5/7/2024)

Back-tracking now, back to Semi-Final 1. It was a wild and amazing show. All of the entries performed spectacularly. There was a bit of a strange sound thing happening, almost like the artists were being drowned out by their own music. The only act that seemed truly touched by this was Poland’s Luna.

The running order:

1. Cyprus “Liar” by Silia Kapsis
2. Serbia “Ramonda” by Teya Dora
3. Lithuania “Luktelk” by Sebastian Belt
4. Ireland “Doomsday Blue” by Bambie Thug
5. Ukraine “Teresa & Maria” by Alyona Alyona & Jerry Heil
6. Poland “Tower” by Luna
7. Croatia “Rim Tim Taga Dim” by Baby Lasagna
8. Iceland “Scared Of Heights” by Hera Björk
9. Slovenia “Veronika” by Raiven
10. Finland “No Rules!” by Windows95man
11. Moldova “In The Middle” by Natalia Barbu
12. Azerbaijan “Özünlə Apar” by Fahree & Ilkin Dovlatov
13. Australia “One Mikali (One Blood)” by Electric Fields
14. Portugal “Grito” by Iolanda
15. Luxembourg “Fighter” by Tali

This year, they did something different, the Big Five, plus the host country, all performed in the Semi-Finals, as well. They were still guaranteed to go through to the Final, but we got to see them all prior to it! I really loved this addition. U.K.’s “Dizzy” by Olly Alexander was after Ireland, Germany’s “Always On The Run” by Isaak was after Iceland, and Sweden’s “Unforgettable” by Marcus & Martinus was after Moldova.

It will be no surprise who I deem as stand-out stars of this leg of the show. Everyone performed amazingly, but there were a couple that gave me goosebumps.

• Lithuania’s “Luktelk” by Silvester Belt – it was amazing, he killed it. The lighting was atmospheric, the dancing energetic.
• Ireland’s “Doomsday Blue” by Bambie Thug – they hands down win the gold in this year’s Performing Arts Olympics. Their staging. Their choreography. Their costuming. Their storytelling. My jaw was on the floor the entire time I watched their dazzling performance, tears in my eyes. (I cannot remember if I got their pronouns correct in my previous Eurovision post, I will for sure go back and check and edit, but I did not I realize they were non-binary, Bambie is they/them.)
• Ukraine’s “Teresa & Maria” by Alyona Alyona & Jerry Heil – absolutely spine-tingling.
• Croatia’s “Rim Tim Tagi Dim” by Baby Lasagna – holy balls, I cannot even begin to convey how amazing this one was. The entire stadium doing his dance was glorious.
• Slovenia’s “Veronika” by Raiven – she somehow made her music video come to life.
• Finland’s “No Rules!” by Windows95man – this was everything I wanted it to be. Insane chaos. Henri hit those high notes impeccably. Teemu was adorably hilarious running around sans-jorts. And that’s a pharse I never thought I would type.

But, alas, those fifteen had to be narrowed down to only a list of ten. The qualifiers were (in no particular order, just how they were announced):

Meaning the journey was over for Australia, Poland, Moldova, Azerbaijan, and Iceland. I was disappointed for Australia, but I also was not really surprised by this list of non-qualifiers. I was more surprised by Serbia and Portugal making it through. Which, I am not sure why, if I have learned one thing in Eurovision, it’s that everyone loves a good power ballad.

Semi-Final 2 (Thursday, 5/9/2024)

When the running orders for the two semi-final dates were first announced, I remember being rather surprised that almost ALL of my favorites were on day 1. There were a lot of songs and artists I enjoyed on day 2, but my BIG faves, were almost all on day 1. But I still found plenty to be excited about!

The running order:

1. Malta “Loop” Sarah Bonnici
2. Albania “Titan” Besa
3. Greece “Zari” Marina Satti
4. Switzerland “The Code” Nemo
5. Czechia “Pedestal” Aiko
6. Austria “We Will Rave” Kaleen
7. Denmark “Sand” Saba
8. Armenia “Jako” Ladaniva
9. Latvia “Hollow” Dons
10. San Marino “11:11” Megara
11. Georgia “Firefighter” Nutsa Buzaladze
12. Belgium “Before The Party Is Over” Mustii
13. Estonia “(Nendest) Narkootikumidest ei tea me (küll) midagi” 5miinust & Puuluup
14. Israel “Hurricane” Eden Golan
15. Norway “Ulveham” Gåte
16. Netherlands “Europapa” Joost Klein

Italy’s “La Noia” by Angelina Mango was after Czechia. Spain’s “Zorra” by Nebulossa was after Latvia. And France’s “Mon Amour” by Slimane was after Estonia – talk about acoustical whiplash there.

Standout thoughts/observations was really the theme for Day 2.

• Greece’s “Zari” by Marina Satti – had some bizarre camerawork choices. I wasn’t a fan of the social-mediae-sque filters she chose to use.
• Switzerland’s “The Code” by Nemo – I was hit with the dawning feeling of I think they might run away with this…
• Armenia’s “Jako” by Ladaniva – holy heck this is fun!
• San Marino’s “11:11” by Megara, one of my top favorites – they were done really dirty by their inner-ear sound mixing, or whatever it’s called, that by the end of the song their lyrics were not at all lined up with their backing music and vocals. It was incredibly disappointing.
• Estonia’s “(Nendest) Narkootikumidest ei tea me (küll) midagi” by 5miinust & Puuluup – exactly the kind of wonderful chaos I was hoping for.
• Israel’s “Hurricane” by Eden Golan – eight words: fake cheering piped in to cover the booing.
• Norway’s “Ulveham” by Gåte – chills.
• Netherlands’ “Europapa” by Joost Klein – Cringey chaos. But… I also loved it.

Even more torturous than having the fifteen from Round 1 reduced to ten, these sixteen needed reducing to ten. The qualifiers were, in no particular order, just how they were announced:

The journey had come to an end for Czechia, Denmark, Belgium, San Marino, Albania, and Malta. I was heartbroken, but not surprised in the least, that San Marino did not make it through. I was surprised that Belgium didn’t make it through, though, as well as Malta. And pleasantly surprised that Armenia made it through.

It is interesting to note, in the graph below, that Netherland’s Joost Klein rather handily beat Switzerland’s Nemo in their Semi-Final. It truly makes me wonder how things would have shaken out, had the incident never taken place and Joost was never disqualified. I think there is a hefty chance that Croatia – or Netherlands – could have won.

Grand Final (Saturday, 5/11/2024)

The day of the Grand Final was filled with uncertainty. The rumor mill was already flinging around speculation about Joost’s newly administered – historic – disqualification. Further outrage was still pouring out about Israel’s allowance to continue, especially given the turmoil now surrounding the Netherlands’ entry. Bambie Thug of Ireland missed their dress rehearsal. There were several artists missing from the Flag Parade, supposedly Ireland, Greece, and Switzerland. As showtime neared, I was getting more than a little nervous that the show would not be able to go off without a hitch.

But somehow, to my untrained American-eye, it did. The hosts sparkled and glimmered. The jokes were funny. The extra acts were just right. And most importantly, the performances were flawless.

The running order for the Grand Final:

1. Sweden “Unforgettable” Marcus & Martinus
2. Ukraine “Teresa & Maria” Alyona Alyona & Jerry Heil
3. Germany “Always On The Run” Isaak
4. Luxembourg “Fighter” Tali
5. Netherlands “Europapa” Joost Klein
6. Israel “Hurricane” Eden Golan
7. Lithuania “Luktelk” Silvester Belt
8. Spain “Zorra” Nebulossa
9. Estonia “(Nendest) Narkootikumidest ei tea me (küll) midagi” 5miinust & Puuluup
10. Ireland “Doomsday Blue” Bambie Thug
11. Latvia “Hollow” Dons
12. Greece “Zari” Marina Satti
13. United Kingdom “Dizzy” Olly Alexander
14. Norway “Ulveham” Gåte
15. Italy “La Noia” Angelina Mango
16. Serbia “Ramonda” Teya Dora
17. Finland “No Rules!” Windows95man
18. Portugal “Grito” Iolanda
19. Armenia “Jako” Ladaniva
20. Cyprus “Liar” Silia Kapsis
21. Switzerland “The Code” Nemo
22. Slovenia “Veronika” Raiven
23. Croatia “Rim Tim Tagi Dim” Baby Lasagna
24. Georgia “Firefighter” Nutsa Buzaladze
25. France “Mon Amour” Slimane
26. Austria “We Will Rave” Kaleen

I really wanted to show all my favorite performances, but I would be pushing ten places. And that seems a lot to ask you to watch. I rather assume you’ll likely skip them anyway. So, I will allow myself my three favorites, and suffice with posting the link to all the others here. Full disclosure, you will likely need a VPN to watch them… Or this handy channel also has them, sans VPN!

Once Kaleen finished her rave, it was time for voting! For the first time in my four Eurovisions, I participated in the voting. And it was the best ~$20 I have ever spent. Knowing I had voted for my favorites made me all the more excited for the results. I gave five points to Croatia, Finland, and Ireland. Then I split my remaining five points between my other favorites: Estonia, Lithuania, Germany, Spain, and Slovenia.

After around an hour, we were finally ready to hear the awardings of the infamous Douze Points from the Juries! As I watched the eventual winner receive an astounding – and record breaking – twenty-two sets of 12 points from the juries, I had a feeling I knew what the end result would be. And sure enough, a few hours later, the winner was announced…

Nemo from Switzerland with “The Code”!

They are the first non-binary winner in Eurovision history. Their song really is a musical feat, combining multiple genres and paired with a grueling physical performance, Nemo’s win is more than well deserved. Switzerland received a total of 591, beating out Croatia’s Baby Lasagna in second with 547 points, a mere dividend of 44 points. They received points from every country’s jury, save for – hilariously – Croatia’s. They received points from every country’s public vote, save for Israel.

The scoring for the winner is made up 50/50 by the jury panel for each country, consisting of five members from that country’s music industry, and the public voting within that country. It’s always fascinating to look at the Jury’s winner, versus the Public’s winner, as they are not always the same. I would even dare to venture that they are rarely the same.

This year’s Jury Winner was Switzerland’s Nemo. The Public’s Winner was Croatia’s Baby Lasagna. The winner of Eurovision 2024 was Switzerland’s Nemo.

2023’s Jury Winner was Sweden’s Loreen. The Public’s Winner was Finland’s Käärijä. The winner of Eurovision 2023 was – outrageously – Loreen.

2022’s Jury Winner was the United Kingdom’s Sam Ryder. The Public’s Winner was Ukraine’s Kalush Orchestra – who received a record-breaking Public Vote of 439 points. The winner of Eurovision 2022 was Kalush Orchestra.

2021’s Jury Winner was Switzerland’s Gjon’s Tears. The Public’s Winner was our lords and saviors, Italy’s Måneskin. The winner of Eurovision 2021 was Måneskin. Yes, that Måneskin.

And those are only the years I have been watching. I’ll resist boring you and going back further, but this is the kind of thing I love: looking at the voting statistics. I love comparing who the technical people preferred, versus who the audience preferred, and now I am genuinely curious to find out if they have ever overlapped.

I did get an absolute giggle out of the moment it was read out that the United Kingdom received zero points from the Public Vote. It reminded me of this glorious moment from the film Eurovision Song Contest: The Story Of Fire Saga.

The overall finishing order was as follows:

Some fun facts about this year: Ireland’s Bambie Thug – who’s moto was Crown The Witch – came in sixth overall, placed sixth in the Public Vote, and sixth in the Jury Vote. 666, a very witchy number, indeed. Estonia’s entry this year had the longest song title in Eurovision history. This year was the only time a contestant has been disqualified. Switzerland’s Nemo won a record-amount of 12 Points from the Juries, with twenty-two in total.

I made some fun little graphics for the data of the voting! And if you find this interesting, just wait until you check out Eurovision World. They have an incredibly fun and interactive chart where you can see how all the points given were broken down.

This year’s Eurovision is the first time I have truly felt myself in a true, post-event blues mindset. I think partly because I didn’t let myself get super excited about it for a long time. They seemed to change some things this year, as well. The Turquoise Carpet, for instance, was a great let down. Instead of having lengthier interviews before walking it, the contestants were limited to less than 60 second blurbs of relative awkwardness. The event that has in years prior taken up four plus hours of my life, was condensed down to just a measly 90 minutes this year. I found myself really struggling to connect with the artists until it was the actual Semi-Finals. I was finding their social medias after their Semi-Finals, versus pre-Turquoise Carpet and being able to view the whole spectacle through their eyes. I am hoping these changes were just due to security concerns and not the route they will be taking in years going forward.

I will close my meandering rambles – because believe me, I could go on for quite a while – with the mesmerizing performance of Nemo’s “The Code.